So this is long....

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teeth_(film)
A film about vagina dentata. That is, the chick in the movie has a vagina with teeth. Apparently Hannah's heard about it, so I don't know if I just discovered something that people have already looked at and said wtf a million times before.

http://www.cracked.com/
By the way, that is a great site.

Holy balls! i nearly forgot! I went to Sarah's birthday party on Friday and Saturday. They got to my mom's office around 7 because of traffic problems. I'm sort of forgetting what happened after we got there. I think we just hung out and looked at ink blots. Most of them were weapons(mostly explosives), dildos or something else I can't remember... It'd be Monica or me seeing a dildo, saying so, and then Becca would say some sort of animal. Such as a Panda. Then I started flicking cards and hit Sarah near the eye, so started a vendetta on me. One I don't think she completed... Eventually Monica and I were throwing cards at each other because Sarah gave up. Then people started laying down or something, Emily and Monica played music back and forth. Then they stopped and started talking about stuff. I don't know how to classify it. Relationships? Sex? One or both of those... I ended up with the advice of I think cleaning, or hiding, or something, with my toys(which I'm not entirely sure I would need one...) and that the G-spot wasn't behind the clitoris... Oh and to do my research. Don't worry, ladies. I pretty much had all of that covered before then. I plan on being a reasonably generous lover at some point... Just in case you all wanted to know. Then everyone was asleep except Sarah and I, who couldn't sleep. So we were talking quietly for a while. It was a mix between being tired and not wanting to sleep. Tired but not sleepy(which might be affected by how I had at least three Moutain Dews that night)? Then I ended up using Sarah as a pillow for a while I think until she got a real one. Then her mom came out and was like You should go to bed because it's late. It was 3 in the morning. Then I moved Emily's hand because it was where I just was because I just got up, and my hand was cold because I actually had just gone to the bathroom and washed my hand with cold water. She woke up and suggested sleeping. I went to bed on the floor of the other room. Because their mom promised some parents to keep the genders separate. Which I have to talk about. Of all the people(notice I include all genders. This is important) that were there, I probably was the least threatening. and I was the only guy there. All of them could have kicked my ass if I decided to rape them in their sleep and one woke up. Although I'm not sure about Sarah. She might be able to, but she doesn't seem to be seriously wanting to cause harm to people or something. I don't know. Maybe because her violence towards me is(I'm hoping) more of a joking manner... So I'd take her violence less seriously than say, EmilyMonicaRebeccaRachelSasha violence. Possibly. I don't know. There were tons of things more likely than me violating them that I don't feel worth getting into since it boils down to: They're parents had no idea. So anyway... did I mention I was the only guy(besides Emily/Sarah's little brother Solomon)? Which was probably why they were able talk about everything they did at night without much comment from me. Just more or less intent listening. Anyway, the next day, I got up around 7, had a croissant(or however you spell it) and Hung out or something for a while. Eventually we started watching The Devil Wears Prada(which I've seen before). Then Sulay and his exchange student showed up, and we stopped it, and NEVER RESUMED IT. What the crap is that? But I've seen it, so I wasn't too irked. I think we all just sat around after that. Then Luke showed up. More talking and sitting. or Standing. Then we had cake or something. Or we went on a walk around the block before. or after. We watched Wall-e at one point. That was cool. Then Sarah opened presents. Then Sulay and Malik(which as his exchange students name, unless I'm wrong. If I am, Emily and Sarah are the ones that should point it out) went home. and Monica left. Then we cleaned up, and then Luke and Solomon played together. There was more in between there I"m sure, but I don't remember it. Then I watched Rachel facebook. Then we went into a room with the bed(By the way, I slept on the floor because I didn't know there was an unused bed in that other room. Bad revelation for the next day) Because Emily's mom was vacuuming. Facebooking continues. Then she lets us play with it. I myspace. Then we go back to the other room. Her computer is shared and everything. Eventually I call home to see if dad left. he didn't. it is 7:30 and they're leaving at 8. We're in LYNNWOOD. AND HE HASN'T LEFT TO PICK ME UP. Turns out it's mom that's coming and getting me. Much relief is had. Eventually she gets there and I have to wave at her from the door so she knows what house it is. I take a box of brownies and two Mountain Dews home with me. On the way home we stop at I think Fred Meyer and Wal-Mart. Lovers, just down the road some, had spotlights. Anyone know what was going on there? There was also an apparent Prom Night(or Tolo, actually) emergency at Fred Meyer where everyone in a fucking HUMMER LIMOSINE had to get out and get some tic tacs. or something. There was like, an exodus from Fred Meyer into the hummer of girls in little dresses and guys in suits, one of the guys had long hair and used product. It could have been a girl playing the man, though. And none of them had any bags or anything. So the question is raised, what the hell? You're in a limo hummer and you stop at Fred Meyer? You're on your way to a dance(in a limo hummer) and you stop at a store at all? What the crap? THen we went to Wal-Mart. I got socks, a Moutian Dew shirt, PE shorts, and playboy boxers. I do believe I got more than my mom. Then we went home and had a stimulating conversation. It was cool. We held up a conversation that went from what went on at the party, to people being dumb to China and our economy or something, and then to something else. It lasted pretty much the whole way home. Then I got on here, then I went to bed, then I went through this day, started this blog, (it is now 7:17) and now I'm finishing it because I started this, then stopped, and then I found a page abotu how Zombies could happen. and a scary motherfucking bacteria or organism. That I must post a link to.
http://www.corante.com/loom/archives/2006/01/17/the_return_of_the_puppet_masters.php Article about it.
http://www.cracked.com/article_15643_p2.html Zombie Danger. This can actually be found on Cracked. But this way is quicker.